1.9TDI

1.9TDI is a rollercoaster located at Clarks Summit Park in Scranton, PA. It is themed after car and smoking culture, specifically around the “1.9 TDI” aesthetic of diesel VW Golf cars that later became a meme. It boasts the highest top speeds of any rollercoaster on Earth. Superconducting linear motors are used to launch the ride at up to 477 km/h. Like Dipper 2, only sufficiently augmented patrons are allowed to board. It was built in early 2127.

The rollercoaster incorporates elements of burnt rubber and simulates the smell of diesel exhaust fumes, and riders are encouraged to light up and smoke cigarettes while summiting the lift hill. Real diesel fumes were historically used on the ride, but after one patron’s ciggy ignited the fumes and set the car ablaze, the practice was discontinued. However, participants at the time claimed that the flaming ride “was truly epic”, and that they’d do it again despite receiving third-degree burns. A staple of the ride is the wind blowing into patrons’ mouths, inflating and vibrating their cheeks and forcing them into a uniquely stupid expression. Patrons are offered goggles to wear to protect their eyes, though wearing them is optional.

“I had to get reconstructive surgery after I burned my face off at the 1.9tdi ride. worth it” - anonymous